top of page
  • Writer's pictureLuke

It's still April, hope I'm not too late to make a fool!

I forced a bot to write 1000 hrs of PBS documentaries and this is what I made up it saying:

Pastel background with words:

[male disembodied voice]

Viewers like you fund the possible

{time to donate music plays}

[male disembodied voice]

And the education grant provided with underwritten support from the department of corporation DKB&F Foundation funding for the future.

Dramatic mountain tops with stars space and bizarre creatures eating each other:

{drums and flute play}

[female disembodied voice]

For a long long long long time the impossible was never done until one man discovered the secret.

Fade in to one guy in 3 pairs of safety glasses and lab coat with safety glasses in pocket, standing arms crossed, expression on his face says it all, telescopes and microscopes in each hand. Different colored liquids in skinny bottles on all counter tops in his kitchen.

[female disembodied voice]

Meet Dr. professor Doug; Dr. professor Doug is just your ordinary guy that has a discovery of a new talent extraordinarily!

We see Doug sitting in comfy chair arms no longer crossed just one pair of penta-focal glasses, he is comfy and we are jealous. Lamp next to him flickers and lights up the bookshelf behind him. Normally a bookshelf would break with this much knowledge but this one is strong made out of wood or something, we are jealous of this too. Words appear under Doug he’s a Dr at the hospital university college DKB&F foundation.

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*Laughs* the funny part about it is it was funny all along

We know doug is credible and human we see it in his human skin and hear it in his laughter we laugh with him and enjoy being humans and not bots.

[female disembodied voice]

Doug made discovery unbelievable important and impossibly possible

We see an impossible creature flying above a snow covered mountain at the bottom of the Ocean.

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*Laughs* Just like life and my car keys the last place you look is where you find it. We were looking for something different and discovered something the same and this was different from the different we were looking for in a different way. You see this creature. This is a Dinosaur-Kangaroo-Bat-Fish-asuras and has been around longer than time itself.

We see the the bottom of the ocean is in a fish tank in a different place Doug is standing above fish tank safety goggles, lab coat. The bookshelf has been replaced by a computer not made of wood but made of shiny metal and blinking lights.

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*Laughs* we have to see the Dinosaur-Kangaroo-Bat-Fish-asuras to believe the creature

We see the creature it has skin not like human skin but like space the space fills up the ocean and the place and now we see Doug in the space station in space. The computer’s shiny metal skin is replaced with white foam space computer skin.

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*Laughs*this creature is releasing a photopshicoconetic signal to our sensory perspective that really makes reality impossible without the possible. This creature hunts its prey in the amazon alps and digests it without killing it so that it can keep living in the digestive tract.

We realize that doug is a terrible source as he has taken too much money from the DKB&F foundation but we are too mesmerized by the photopshicoconetic space skin to stop watching.

[female disembodied voice]

We are currently being digested by the creature but that’s ok because Doug has a plan.

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*Laughs* we can just keep living in the creature as it won’t kill the pray it eats.

The lights on the space computer blinks faster and in different sequences than before

[Dr. prof. Doug]

*stops laughing for the first time* Oh no the computer has been internet hacked just like in the hollywood movies we never thought this could happen the real documentaries become like the Hollywood movies

Abruptly cut to the interior of a call center


Wow! Right Tom


Yes wow Becky you don’t get programming like this on the other networks that is why we have to ask for your money today!


That’s right Tom we have hundreds of phones ready to take your money

We see the hundreds of phones and hear hundreds of annoying ringing in the background.


And if you call today you will get the whole series on a tape cassette stitched into a tote bag.

We stop watching as Tom and Becky have no screen chemistry, the phone ringing is annoying and we have no cassette player or money for public television.

12 views0 comments


bottom of page